| 04.15.2002-1:14 pm
I�m sitting in drama class as I write down these things that happen to be invading my personal space, which is my mind. My mind is my personal space and it does me wonders. But as I sit and look around the classroom I am in. Not only do I take note of the details of the room but the people and their details. As for one I�m sitting in the farthest place off all, the back wall. Everyone else is up front. I�m sitting on the floor between two blue chairs. An electrical outlet on one side with the cord following behind my back. But not only am I sitting against that wall but I sit alone by myself. I�m only in that drama class for exactly one hour but with that hour I go from being alone to more alone. Not only am I alone because no one is around me but my mind has stumbled into a pit where the darkness is all around and than again I am more alone than ever. My mind drifts at this point. It�s a point where I can�t return back so soon and so easily. I can here the other girls laughing and talking in front of the room but I cannot comprehend what is being said. I just know they are probably laughing over last nights date or whom they saw. And it does hurt that I am not involved in to that conversation. Most times I am glad that I am not in those conversations. I wonder though sometimes when I�m sitting there if anyone knows my name for that matter. Does anyone know that my name happens to be Jennifer? Do they know anything about me I wonder? Do they even know my last name? Do they even care that I sit in between them. I wonder if they realize I will be one day the person who foretells them that when they die they will be the ones alone. Do they actually sit there and wonder these things too? But what I am trying to say about all this is that I may feel sad at times and depressed at times but in reality, but glad that I�m Alive. And they are just people that don�t know that it feels good to be alive. |